Within the 31 years of my existence, there's 20 years or so I have full comprehension of.
And of the many things I've learned from others, or the trial and errors of my own explorations through those years, there's three consistent topics I've realized are taboo in casual conversations.
Religion, politics, and whether Revolver or Abbey Road is the better Beatles album.
Last week, former Growing Pains star Kirk Cameron, decided to come out of the closet to speak out against those who come out of the closet.
Only difference is, Cameron's closet is also known as irrelevancy.
On CNN's Piers Morgan Show, Friday night, the evangelical former teen idol voiced his opinion on homosexual rights.
“I believe marriage was defined by God," said Cameron. "Marriage is almost as old as dirt, and it was defined in the Garden between Adam and Eve. One man, one woman for life till death do you part. So I would never attempt to try to redefine marriage. And I don’t think anyone else should either. So do I support the idea of gay marriage? No, I don’t.”
When asked to acknowledge whether or not he feels homosexuality is a sin, he obliged.
"I think that it's...unnatural. It's detrimental and ultimately destructive to so many of the foundations of civilization."
If anyone has seen Kirk Cameron act, the word unnatural is reserved for his career.
At first, I was taken aback by his insolent comments, and utter failure to ride the changing currents of time. But nothing made me gasp more than the understanding that Kirk Cameron was never gay in the first place.
You learn something new every day, folks.
In the top three results that appear after typing Kirk Cameron is... into Google, I'm comforted in the thought that I'm not alone in my assumptions. Roughly 209 million hits go into the Google search engine each year. Clearly I'm not the only one who thought his sudden anti-gay attacks were friendly fire.
Boy, Kirk Cameron could certainly make a tasty toe omelet with the egg that's on his face, and the foot that's in his mouth.
His gay bashing tour is the latest act on the homophobia circuit. Since taking it to the streets, he and his day dreaming doobie brothers are stirring pots with all the wrong recipes.
Problem is, Cameron and his supporters are too concerned with rummaging through someone else's trash to acknowledge their own hoardings.
If homosexual men and women want to make honest people out of each other, and be able to stand at an alter to domesticate their union, aren't they doing right by God after all?
More and more states are approving legislation that permits gay marriage. The heterosexual opinion is starting to shift from I don't care as long as they don't touch me, to I don't care if they touch me, I'm secure in my sexuality.
Being homophobic in 2012 America, is becoming increasingly less popular than Lindsay Lohan.
Continuing to support Christian values on marriage, when the divorce rate is still at incredulous heights, makes me wonder why there is such a persistent voice trying to protect an institution many people don't take as seriously anymore.
If Cameron and his religious lynch mobs have time to force their religious beliefs on people unwilling to subscribe to any belief but the beat of their heart, then they have time to form a support group that benefits our children. The future of our society. The ones who feel the need to gain attention by taking their peers lives in the cafeterias of schools.
Because becoming a prosperous citizen of society doesn't involve the alienation of those who are turned on by things that shut you down. It's about protecting the livelihood of our future and making sure it's in safe hands.
It's time for Kirk Cameron to let go of his 1985 state of mind.
Because who gives he and his God squad the right to play match maker?
Heidi Fleiss-ing his way back into the spotlight is making Kirk Cameron look more like a pimp of Christianity rather than a disciple.
He doesn't have to abandon his faith as much as he needs to reevaluate how aged his lessons have become.
For someone whose bread was once buttered by the dimples of his smile, and a killer hazel stare, one would assume Kirk Cameron would know how to avoid such hideousness.
You don't need scriptures to tell you that God don't like ugly.
No, this isn't a mockery of Christianity. It's sincerely a stance against its insurgents that continue to devalue human elation with terroristic agendas.
Perhaps this is just another rinsed and dried celebrity making an attempt to soak in fifteen more minutes of fame? If Cameron is without sin, then by all means, he can throw the first stone.
But I get it though. Really, I do.
Defending the rights of homosexuality isn't everyone's cup of tea. But this is more the reason for them to enjoy their coffee quietly.
As crazy as it sounds, some people do like Abbey Road more than Revolver. That's the beauty of freedom.
The former goodie-two-shoes every 80s teen girl wanted to bring home, now suddenly is speaking out against what makes someone else's heart throb. While too busy worrying about how one man could be aroused by another man, Kirk Cameron forgot to consider the power of love, and how it discriminates against no race, religion, or sexual orientation.
But maybe he just can't focus passed the sexuality part of homosexuality.
Shame on him, then.
Because it appears his growing pains are the only ones with a Boner.